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"We must defend America's borders!" - A common cry among the proud members of the U.S. legislature seeking re/election in the U.S and those seeking the White House nod. Of all the discussion and debate the most creative and profound idea to be produced is (drum roll)...to build...(more drum roll)..a FENCE. You got it!
A fence I said. Not just any fence though, but a soaring fence equipped with infrared night vision cameras accessible by Americans voyeur style. The ground will be lined with quicksand and those large worms from the award-winning film Tremors. The tops of the fence will house heat seeking missiles and attack owls. ABC and FOX will provide network coverage and call it Most Xtreme-America’s Border Challenge.
This will serve a few purposes. It will protect our border agents from being entwined in rock-throwing scuffles and reduce their chance of unjust incarceration. With no longer needing to shoot at drug traffickers we’ll have more agents focused on the real mission - waiting on the fence.
The fence will also serve as a sign of America’s greatness. Just think how badass China looked with a wall spanning as far as the eye could see. Speaking of which, why aren’t the Chinese being brought over to build our fence? Not only do they have the labor force, but imagine the cost-savings! Congress would have plenty of cash to spend on missile defense or more pressing matters like turtle tunnels.
There are plenty of other purposes a fence on our border would serve. Such as; giving people something to try and find on Google Earth, create a federal land dispute and it may even slow down immigration (maybe). Only time will tell both if and when a fence will grace this nation’s southern border. Until then I suggest using landmines and out of work scout snipers .
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Fred Thompson may not be the only movie star looking for an elected position of power. Tom Cruise discusses in a recent video his plan to "fight the fight" and "help people out there" who are "depending on us" [By us referring to Scientology and not Sean Penn's politically charged Team Hollyworld].
Tom's religiously fueled promises of taking care of the unsaved seem to mirror the biblical constitutional rewrite of the Huckster. I doubt Chuck Norris would even be able to defend the evangelical takeover from the cocktail mixin’ flyboy and his galaxy traveling entourage.
I still think it would be interesting to see Tom Cruise enter the race. The primaries have such a strong politically labeled mix among them - what better than a movie star Scientologist ! Where would this country end up with Mr. Mission Impossible at the wheel.? No idea, but it sure would be one hell of a ride! Hold on tight...
Dr. Common Sense
Mr. Luong gets pissed off at his wife and decides instead of slapping her around like any good Vietnamese immigrant in Alabama would do, he decides to throw his kids off a bridge instead.
Here is what I find disturbing - the confessed (keyword confessed) killer will now go before a jury to determine his sentence for hurling his four children 80ft into a freezing river. Who knows, maybe in his defense this was a technique used in Vietnam to toughen up your offspring and weed out the weak ones. Then again I highly doubt the ancestral culture of this lunatic played a role in this gruesome act.
Four counts of capital murder should easily have this guy swinging from the gallows by summer, but America loves its appeals process. I didn’t see anyone protesting the quick execution of the former president of Iraq. Did he get an appeal?
This guy will die in prison like other confessed murderous psychopaths. He’ll never see the death penalty. Crimes like this cost American’s thousands of dollars and give no deterrent to evil actions of this nature to the general public.
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